


Running Out Again

by rcmbelle



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, dont read if not caught up, lucifer is a sad Devil, season four spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-09
Updated: 2019-05-09
Packaged: 2020-02-28 18:31:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18762019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rcmbelle/pseuds/rcmbelle
Summary: Nightmares plague Lucifer of the Detective leaving. And they won’t leave him for the entire month she’s gone.





	Running Out Again

**Author's Note:**

> This is heavy with season four spoilers but I couldn’t get this idea out of my head. A little shorter than stuff I usually write so I’m sorry about that. Enjoy this Deckerstar angst

They wouldn’t stop. Lucifer couldn’t get the nightmares out of his head. He would dig his fingers in his scalp and try anything to get them to leave.  
But nothing could keep them away, no drug, no drink, nothing would keep the nightmare away.  
“It’s all true.” The words would escape Chloe’s lips, and as Lucifer reached for her, she was gone in a swarm of cops, and he was too late. She was gone and he wasn’t sure she would ever come back again. All Lucifer wanted was to just see her face one more time, just once more. But then that wouldn’t be enough, he would want more. He couldn’t help himself, she was Chloe. Special Chloe who made the Devil himself want to change.  
He played the song each night, hoping it would help.  
It didn’t.  
Her words wouldn’t leave his brain, wouldn’t leave his thoughts.  
Sleep was out of the question, and even when he did the nightmares would take him down and down into his own personal hell. All Lucifer wanted to do was know where she was, but he also knew the Detective needed space and space he would give her.  
He drove by her apartment almost every day. When Maze was there, she would tell him Chloe wasn’t there, and it was dark when Maze was out bounty hunting, which she was doing more and more. Soon there was no light on in the apartment ever.  
Lucifer even missed Chloe’s little urchin, too. He missed the way Chloe would light up when she talked about her. He could picture her face in his mind, and it drove him nuts.  
He would drive up to crime scenes where he knew the LAPD would be. He would always expect to see Chloe, but was always met with  
“She’s not here Lucifer. Go home.” Dan would tell him, the same words every single day. “We don’t need you.”  
And Lucifer would go, because what was the point in staying if Chloe wasn’t there to be his partner? They made each other better. She lit up his world in the darkness and he had messed everything up.  
The song was played every night now. Sometimes more than once. Lucifer felt like he was wearing out the piano keys as he played the song with so much emotion, so much heart and loss that he couldn’t express in words to anyone. The only thing that got him through was music.  
It was all he had, really. Because who else would understand? Who else would understand what he was going through each night, seeing her face in his dreams and yet the Detective was always out of his reach?  
So Lucifer kept playing. And playing. Until it became second nature to him. It took all of him to sing, to get the words out some nights. Because he would never admit this to anyone out loud, but he missed her.  
He wondered where she was.  
-  
“Did you play, while I was gone?” Chloe asked as Lucifer was sat at the piano. He was going to break her heart, but he just couldn’t. Not yet. He wanted just a few more minutes in her presence. A few more seconds surrounded by everything that was just simply Chloe Decker.  
The day was saved, but that was it. The day. The next day there could be demons on their front step. They could hurt Charlie, or even Chloe. And Lucifer knew he couldn’t let that happen.  
The nightmares were gone, replaced with a new thought, a new worry. Chloe’s safety was everything to Lucifer, and he wouldn’t let anything, or anyone, ever hurt her again.  
“I did.” Lucifer said quietly. “But it was mainly just this one song.” His fingers began the familiar melody, his lips still as the song ran through his head. He felt Chloe sit next to him and he let out a quiet breath.  
“Chloe..” Lucifer couldn’t find the words to say. Her hand laid over his. They didn’t need words, not yet. Not until he had to say goodbye. And he knew that time was coming soon.  
-  
“And I’m running...” the words left Lucifer’s lips as he stared out at the vastness that was Hell, upon his lonely, quiet throne. It was eerily quiet. He swallowed as he looked up, longing to be anywhere but here, the place he had run from for so long. Lucifer didn’t want to be here. He wanted to be with Chloe. But he knew this had to be the only option to keep his first and only love, safe.  
“Running out again...”


End file.
